The other night when I finally settled on a title for this blog I realized my son Matthew was hanging out near the computer. I noticed him gazing at the title and found myself reassuring him it was not a blog about him (yet here I am writing about him - sorry Matt!). Matthew is ... in fact all three boys are ... inspiring to me. Matthew is hooked on running and has a goal of running in the Olympics one day. He's in the process of joining a running club and attempting to get into Birchmount high school for their athletics program. Jonathan is currently writing his second novel. When November rolls around it is novel writing time for him ... 30 days ... 50,000 words!! It's incredible. David also is an inspiration; an inspiration of imagination. He composes songs almost daily singing about his friends and the made up crazy things they do (I think they are made up!?!? Hmmm... :) All three are full of potential - amazing potential.
I've been thinking about Matthew lately - the author of the book of Matthew. I'm going to check out some passages that talk directly about him, to get an idea about where he was coming from when he wrote the gospel. What do you know? What can you share?
As I thought about it a bit - even before really 'studying' - I remembered the passage where Matthew was called by Jesus. It must be from a picture from a Sunday school lesson I taught or something but I have this mental picture of Matthew sitting at a little table on the top of a hill with people walking by, paying their taxes to him. Matthew was a tax collector - and a Jew - employed by the Romans - and as a result he was probably not the most popular person in town. So why did Jesus call him? What did He see in him? Did He see someone who could do a job competantly? Did He see someone who one day would be capable of organizing thousands of people on a hill for a picnic? Did He see someone who endured people's distrust and dislike and think he might be someone who could empathize with Him one day? Did He see a whole lot of potential in Matthew?
What does God see in me? Does He see me for what I can be? for what I can bring to Him? Hmmm. What does God see in you? Does God look at our potential?
I was thinking about this in the middle of the night last night. It's been rolling around in my head a bit. But what dawned on me as I thought about it was this... perhaps Jesus did not think so much about what Matthew could do for Him, but what Jesus - spending time with Him, knowing Him - could do for Matthew. Jesus' impact on Matthew enabled him to do what he did - enabled him (inspired by God) to write the gospel. Jesus' relationship with Matthew changed his life forever and resulted in this book that has in turn, changed others lives as they too have come into contact with Jesus.
The potential for a changed life ... for a life of worth ... for an abundant life ... for a life lived in service for Jesus ... this comes as I, as all people, spend time with Him. What a thought!
2 comments:
I've come back to this post because I keep coming back to the idea of thinking that Jesus wanted to do something for Matthew. Do you think so? If Jesus only saw Matthew for what he could do for Him, what kind of a person/God would He be??? Sounds more like some humans I know ... more human than divine ... but if we think (and I have no way of knowing for sure of course) that Jesus wanted to touch Matthew's life, impact it, love Him as His Saviour, and His guide that seems to me to be a more true picture of who God is. Of course God wants to use us - wants to live through us to bring Him glory ... but maybe the way He is glorified is by us being so greatly impacted by His love for us. Perhaps that's why this post keeps coming back to me ... God reminding me that He loves me more than He wants to use me. He isn't a 'using' God ... He is love.
Ya, I don't think God looks at "potential" cuz there's not a lot to look at in most of the broken vessels he chooses to use. A stutterer for a spokesperson? A prostitute for a predecessor of the Saviour? A bunch of uneducated fishermen as disciples? Me as a mom? I think you're right that it's about His love. He uses all us broken vessels to demonstrate His amazing love and grace and power. There's nothing that's in US that's worthy -- only HIM. It's not OUR potential -- it's HIS potential IN us as we let there be more and more of Him and less and less of us.
So, I agree with your follow up post -- He isn't a "using God" -- He doesn't NEED to use us. He just chooses to love us in spite of our brokeness -- and then great things come of that love in us! :)
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